Lately I have been thinking about the differences of BEING ALONE and FEELING LONELY.
Recently, and for the first time in my life, I am living on my own. That is quite a statement, since I am almost 45 years old!
So as you can imagine, many emotions and feelings have arisen within me. The sense of independence and wholeness is,slowly but surely, starting to make a home within my being.
I won’t lie, it has been a challenge. My identity as a mother has had to be completely rebranded. My grown children finally living as they should, in their own nests.
In my experience so far, BEING ALONE is giving me room to explore and discover who I am. Who I am outside of a mother, a daughter, sister, yoga teacher. The time of BEING ALONE is allowing me to find the explorer within. Asking difficult questions of myself, about my journey so far. Having the courage to face my short comings, but also to be able to love myself fully as I am. Without any needs or wants from others.
Of course, FEELING LONELY does enter my life situation. Especially after living with a full house, for all of my adult life. This is where I have to bring discipline into my life. So what do I do? I make plans. Plans to see loved ones, plans to do fun things, plans to be with people that I want to share my life with. However I have to find that balance. Making sure that the plans then are not taking away from my BEING ALONE. As the BEING ALONE, is where the growth is happening within me.
So my dear friend, have a look at the title of this post again. Try BEING ALONE. Invite space and give time to the one who is your constant companion, YOURSELF.
Having just returned from a little break away, it seems that I have managed to catch the Holiday Blues. The return to day to day life is something that I usually look forward to. However this time it looks like there is more grounding required to become present and here, rather than back on the beach. So to do this I have been using some sesame oil to rub into my feet before I sleep at night. Sesame oil has great grounding qualities according to the Indian Science of Ayurveda. Also some alternate nostril breathing to reconnect me to my body and to the here and now.
So if you feel like you need to come back to your life rather than still be on holiday, try these two little tips and see if they work for you.
For alternate nostril breath, imagine you are breathing through right nostril and out left nostril, in left nostril and out right nostril. This is considered one round. Try and do 12 rounds with your eyes closed and sitting comfortably on a chair with your spine tall. If this is comfortable for you, stay a little bit longer doing this practice. Then when you feel grounded, slowly open your eyes and end the practice.
You can find good quality sesame oil at any health food store, just make sure it’s not the toasted kind, as then you will smell of a good stir fry!
The move has happened.
I Am sitting at the computer now, on the other side of the change.
A place where for the first time in my life I am waking up to a home that I am not sharing. A place were stillness and silence greets me, first thing in the morning. I will not deny that I am still in a place of transition regarding the silence and the non sharing. I am catching myself doing unnecessary chores around the house, so that I don’t have to sit in the silence. The radio HAS to be on for the moment to cover up the echo of no noise. The lesson for this week, for me, will be not to make my surrounding unnecessarily noisy.
What do you think your lesson for the week should be?
May you have peace wherever you are.
Today my son is spending his last night at his childhood home. There is an array of feelings that are running through me, the mother.
Firstly, I will be the first to admit that the time has come. The time has come for this young man to start doing his own laundry!! That is my humour keeping me from crying as I write this.
The time has come for this young man, who I am so proud of, to have his full independence, as a parent I hope that I have been able to provide the tools for this moment of his life.
It is such a strange feeling, from the moment he was born all that I wanted to do is to protect and hlep him. To keep him always near so that I could run to the rescue. Now the lesson, is that the way I could do all those things, is to Let him go. Let him make his mistakes, let him make his successes and to watch now from the side lines, rather than being on the track with him.
So my dear reader, is it time for you to let go of someone, to release the ropes of protection and trust that your loved one will be safe on their journey of life. That your loved one will live their life as it is meant to be.
Good morning all!
First blog, how very exciting.
It seems to be all about change right now.
New Website. New Home.
After living in my present home for almost 20 years, time has come to move on. So these past few weeks have been about “decluttering” and getting rid of items that no longer serve a purpose or are needed.
In doing this cleaning up, I find that old memories and emotions are coming up to the surface. Some that I did not even realize were still around. So, you can imagine the roller coaster of emotions that have been whirling inside of me. Smiles at looking through old pictures, tears at reading old letters from loved ones.
In all of this realizing what an incredibly rich life I have had so far and thanking the universe for all that has occurred. All the “good” all the “bad, as both have helped shape me into the person I am today. The challenges have been the making of my character, and the good times have been the breather needed in between the challenges.
So even if you aren’t moving, take time to do a bit of “decluttering”. Do away with what is no longer being used, maybe it will be just a pair of old socks! Or maybe it will be a whole suitcase full of “things” that are no longer useful to you. Whatever it is for you, sit with the experience and watch what comes up for you, acknowledge it and then release it and find space, in your home, in your heart.
LOVE to all x